5:26 p.m. ET: LaViolette said there is a difference between how men and women fear. Women can be more cautious and more aware of their surroundings in public.
5:20 p.m. ET: Willmott is now asking LaViolette to explain the "cycle of violence." LaViolette said tension between the two partners builds to abuse, and then there is the honeymoon phase afterwards where the couple makes up. Hope grows in the honeymoon phase that the violence won't happen again.
“The cycle of violence is basically a tension building phase, an episode and a honeymoon phase. So that what happens is, there’s tension – it builds – there’s an incident -- whether that incident is emotional or that incident is physical, whether that incident is verbal – that happens and then there’s the honeymoon. And the honeymoon phase is where they make up, there’s that rekindled hope again. There’s that belief that things will change,” said LaViolette.
5:15 p.m. ET: LaViolette is explaining again how the periods between violence give the victim hope, and can keep them trapped in an abusive relationship.
5:13 p.m. ET:
Willmott asked, “Is that something you find in treating men that have been perpetrators of abuse, about their self-esteem? That it’s low?"
“It may not appear that way at all. They may be very successful, they may be very charismatic, they may have positions of power on the outside. But it’s more how you feel on the inside. And it’s more how you feel in that intimate situation. Because you can feel very powerful anywhere else but in that intimate situation you can still feel powerless,” said LaViolette.
5:11 p.m. ET: Now LaViolette is explaining Stockholmm syndrome where hostages start identifying with their kidnappers, and how it relates to domestic violence situations.
5:10 p.m. ET: LaViolette can eventually begin blame themselves for the abuse, and will become stuck in abusive relationships.
“If they’re early enough on, [the victim] usually will blame themselves but feel like they can change it. And that’s the hope – the hope is you can change it, the belief is you can change it. And by the way, the perpetrator of domestic violence usually believes they can stop it,” said LaViolette.
5:08 p.m. ET:
“In sexual assault we might look at the way somebody is dressed or who they’re hanging out with or if they were drinking or whatever… in domestic violence there’s a lot of times the issue of provocation. People will say, ‘Well you shouldn’t have said this or done this and you’re provoking the person.’ So there’s this cause and effect attachment – if you hadn’t done this, then I wouldn’t have done this back to you kind of thing,” said LaViolette.
5:06 p.m. ET:
"You can't keep hurting people you love and feel good about it," said LaViolette.
5:05 p.m. ET: LaViolette said abusers will blame the victim for their own anger.
5:03 p.m. ET: Arias looks sad as she watches LaViolette talk about examples how a victim of domestic violence can behave.
_________________ Do not go gentle into that good night.___________ Rage, rage against the dying of the light
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